A Masterclass in How Not to Run a Business If you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to place an order and then enter a parallel universe where time, communication, and basic competence cease to exist, may I humbly recommend KES Lighting? After placing my order, I embarked on a six-month odyssey of pure suspense. Would my order arrive? Would anyone know anything? Would I still be alive by the time it shipped? The answer, of course, was a resounding “no” — to all of the above. In that time, I was serenaded by dozens of apologetic emails, each one more artfully devoid of useful information than the last. Bravo, KES Lighting — it takes true talent to apologize this often without ever solving anything. When I dared to ask questions, the silence was deafening. Four different people, including a manager, all joined the circus act that was my order. Not one of them managed to uncover the small, insignificant detail that the product I ordered no longer existed. A tricky fact, to be sure. After all, it only took me an hour to discover it myself with a simple online search. Perhaps that skill requires a PhD in “Using Google.” So if you’re in the market for lighting, and also want to cultivate patience, despair, and a creeping sense of absurdist comedy, KES Lighting is your one-stop shop. The lights may never arrive, but the lessons in futility are positively illuminating