After arranging for a sickeningly large bunch of roses to be sitting on my partner's doorstep Sunday evening in an effort to take the edge off her struggling through a marathon twelve hour shift saving people's lives while the computers were down, I was expecting to switch my phone on this morning to be inundated with Man Points. However, I was greeted only with a message expressing her undying love for me. I promptly ignored the sentiment and asked if anything had been left on her doorstep, thus completely negating the carefully engineered element of surprise. To this end, she ran downstairs, probably knocking a wealth of priceless Ming vases and original Da Vinci paintings from the wall only to confirm there hadn't. I immediately got in contact with Serenata who, in their defence, replied briskly and sincerely, stating there had been a mixup at the DPD depot and offered a 15% discount by way of apology. Now, I consider offering of a 15% discount in return for the element of surprise being completely ruined, our wasting valuable time and energy chasing something that shouldn't have been an issue in the first place, having to deal with the crippling disappointment this has put upon me as a disabled man doing all he can to prevent his partner from realising that she could do a lot better, and being at the wrong end of a barrage of questions demanding to know what I've "done this time" as far from adequate. The best apology, I feel, would be to use a courier service that doesn't have a history of making customer's teeth itch. I now have to use two hands to mark the number of times I have been let down by DPD. That's just one person being let down by a courier service that serves millions and has the audacity to call themselves, "The delivery experts". There is even a link on their website dedicated to displaying all the awards they have earned whilst serving Joe Public the cream of failed deliveries, missing deadlines and non-existent parcels. Come on, Serenata, you can do better.