“After coughing up my tax payment, I anticipated receiving my money as quickly as possible. No, they are involved in a financial pursuit of some sort. I've tried carrier pigeons, smoke signals, and even Morse code, but I haven't gotten a response. But don't worry, fellow fools—I've managed to get my stash back, if a little embarrassingly. My only suggestion? Visit M.E.R.S.E.Y.H.I.P..COM to avoid the headache. If the money wheel stops turning, they know just what to do.”
